Thursday, June 17, 2004
word to the wise: always clean your room before the cable guy comes to install a new system.
i had completely forgotten he was coming at all...totally slipped my mind.
normally it wouldn't matter, aside from a few errant bits of clothing on the floor i generally keep the bedroom tidy. i am usually particularly particular about keeping certain items discreetly stored, but of course this was the one day where everything had slipped out of my grasp and out of its hiding spaces.
i let the cable guy in, thinking he will be working on the office tv or one of the ones in the upstairs rooms and so continue on about my business, wiping crud off my kitchen counters. then i hear a rustle in MY bedroom and run through a flash check in my mind of the rooms status...you see, our housemate was recently away on vacation and well, privacy is a precious commodity in this house so we wanted to make the most of the time we had with it to ourselves...
i tried to sort of casually slip into the room while he was working, ostensibly to you know, be helpful or something, and then started attempting to execute an elaborate series of maneuvers to remove items from view. usually i am pretty good at that sort of stealth, i can make objects disappear at will, but i was out matched this time, the bedroom was a minefield of contraband.
he had already headed straight for the tv (of course) where there was a mixture of yoga dvds and porn sitting on top of the set, he turned his back for a moment and i whisked them into the closet. when he turned the other way i tossed a shirt over my glass piece. i thought i was on top of the situation but after my auspicious start things started to unravel.
the thing about cable guys is the they always have all this wire they want to run everywhere. over, under, above, and behind every blessed fucking thing they can get their hands on. so before i know it he is running wires under the dresser, where i suddenly remember throwing some girlie magazines like 2 years ago. sure enough he starts digging around under there to feed some cable and a couple of titty mags slide out. great. i am hoping the layer of dust covering them is thick enough to obscure the covers and try to nudge them back under with my toe. moving on, he starts testing the tv, turning it off and on, trying to get the signal to load. i have one of those little 13 inch things that you buy at costco for 89 bucks that has a vcr built in, pretty convenient, but if there is anything sitting in the vcr it ejects it when you hit the power button. sure enough, he hits that power button and a tape pops out with a label emblazoned across the side with the inspired title, in my own handwriting, 'PORN TAPE VOL.2".
will the embarrassments never cease? apparently not yet because then he started running the cable behind my bed...i am not even going to get into what he may have run into back there. even i draw the line somewhere.
i suppose as a cable guy he must have this sort of thing happen all the time. when i think about it, its enough to tempt me into trying to get a job in the field, all those personal spaces to explore...and i guess it all didn't make such a terrible impression on him because before he left he also installed a memory card in my computer, gave me a new modem for it, and also a hug on the way out. now that's service. maybe i should start hiding porn under my kitchen and bathroom sinks so i can get a sweet deal when the plumber comes...do you think it would be too obvious if i duct taped a few dvd's to the back of the toilet?
posted by Ms_Bunnie 7:32 PM
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Wednesday, June 16, 2004
remember that online peition link i posted a little while ago about the rollback in organic food standards? well, our voice was heard...within 24 hours there were so many letters that the rollbacks have been recinded! hooray!! if nothing else its nice to see that some of these petitions do make a difference, so thanks to any of you that clicked and signed!
oh, and if you are into that sort of preservation/global conciousness/organic kind of thing (as we increasingly are in the bunnie warren) have a look at redjellyfish.com...not only are they informative, but they have really addictive online jigsaw puzzles too.
posted by Ms_Bunnie 5:43 AM
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Sunday, June 13, 2004
had a dream i ate mister L's penis. just sat down at the table with it on a plate looking for all the world like a kilbasa, and gobbled it right up with a knife and fork. oddly, he didnt seem to mind.
maybe i miss meat more than i previously thought.
posted by Ms_Bunnie 6:02 PM
i am overwhelmed at the response i have gotten about my little mommy tirade. huge amounts of support and many letters from people i hadn't ever heard from before. i never anticipated it would strike such a chord...and i guess that's the point, i felt so alone about it and now i don't and neither should anyone else, apparently there are more of us out there than one might guess.
in other news, mister L and i have just completed our first week as vegetarians. i didn't mention it before because i kinda wanted to see how it went, i don't know if it is going to last but i at least wanted to give it a try .
i notice as soon as you tell even your most reasonable carnivorous friends that you have gone veggie, they freak out (i didn't even tell bryan, i bet when he reads this i will be able to hear him screaming at me all the way from albany.) they seem to take it very personally and immediate attempts are made to bring you back to the fold. arguments are made on behalf of continued meat consumption, some of them (very few) may even have some merit but the final fact is i just don't want to eat that shit any more so i am not gonna. it is a reflection of an increasing fastidiousness i have been feeling about food in general. the more i learn about what is in some of the food we regularly eat the less i want to eat it.
hormones, antibiotics, ground up fish bits from god knows where, pesticides, irradiation, partially hydrogenated anything, preservatives, and in the case of meat fear and adrenaline.
yuck yuck yuck.
no thanks, i know i cant avoid it all, all of the time, but that doesn't mean i cant try.
besides, i am curious. i have been thinking about the body a lot lately. i know first hand from my days doing drugs what profound effects the combination of chemicals you put into it can have. i started to wonder, what would happen if i took the same principle and applied to food, vitamins and excercise. so this week its been no meat, a ton of vitamins, and an hour of yoga everyday.
preliminary findings suggest i feel fucking fantastic.
i walk around mostly in a state of chilled out bliss. i have gone so overboard with this that even the cats are on a heath food diet now. i make their own vitamin enriched organic cat food at home. i cook up a little chicken, some steamed veggies, garlic, a sweet potato and toss it all in the cuisinart. mister L thinks i have lost my mind but i feel too good to notice.
posted by Ms_Bunnie 6:01 PM
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